hush now baby don't say a word....

"why must one live to die? why must we try and fail? why do we live at all? i wonder if there is a higher power, a higher being, if they care at all? or are we part of someone's insanely large, 6 billion, puppet collection? i wonder why do we exist at all?"

Have u ever took a step back and analyzed/examined/looked at ur life?
the likelyhood of u ever doing this is high. and probably quite often. we look at where we r in life, wat milestones we've passed, which ones we should be at. wat r the things we have accomplished, wat have we not accomplished?
when we look at the world around us our lives may seem like a mockary. we are lead to believe we r individualist, orignial, unique. but the truth is we are all the same. we r not unique, sorry ur mum lied, but we r all cut from the same cookie cutter. its not anything we could have helped, we have be taught this since the beginning of time. we are all just miniscule beings, part of a greater society and an even greater so world. being part of this massive system, one in which we have no control over, is very diificult.
it is very easily for one to have a sense of helplessness, wats the point anyway?... i kno that road way too well, but i cant help but believe that im not the only one who has been there. so perhaps you have been here, the road i find myself this afternoon. a road filled with: questions about the unknown. why does one exist, why is there pain, failure, love, hate, why does one worry, why do we look forward to a future, why try...we just die, wats the point of all this, does God really exist, why did God create us, and the list can go on for an infinite amount of miles.

Today for the first time ever i met a young woman named: Benita Veliz. Benny is intelligent, sweet, funny, ambitious, kind, caring, and all together a wonderful person. before today i knew who Benny was, but today a door was opened to get to kno her. her stories of adversity she has faced are marvelous. im astonished dat someone with so much adversity in her life still is ambitous, optimistic, and still has a very strong faith in God. Benny has inspired me greatly.

i dont have all the answers to my questions. but i do believe, there is something to this life, something greater than wat meets the eyes!

da dill-io...

so here is da dill-io....lol

ive been super busy lately working two jobs to save money for skool....which hasnt neccessarily been working! Next weekend is when skool is going to start and i have no money....so yeah i really wanna go i just dont see dat happening! =( i really dont kno wat God has in store for my life...i thought i knew...but here lately i really feel i dont! ive been feeling really down lately, i guess because i now am having to deal with consequences due to the STUPID decisions i choose to make.... my life is really sucky rite now but o well........

porcupines prik...lol

ok so lately i have started back to work @ wal-mart-izzle! boo... as a cashier...
nothing really interesting has happened lately except me still crushing on this guy... who will remain nameless! because this internet thingy is crazzee and he might eventually find this....lol ne ways so pray for me!!! =] Tomorrow i will be givin a devo to da uth grp and it will also be the premire of my first official random video...lol "my trip to burger king" which i will post on here at a later date! we maybe.... stayin kewl always

-scenekidcali23

ps. follower me on twitter: scenekidcali23 myspace: glitter_glam_princess or facebook!

Things Accomplished Today!

Well today only had one interesting event, which was me pee-ing my pants!!! yikes :/

-So i had been holding my urine....lol in for a couple of hours and i decided to scare my niece. She had been watching the movie "darkness falls"? i think about an evil tooth fairy... ne ways i attempted to scare her n snuck up behind her making scary noises, aka heavy breathing like on the movie.... but it wasnt working!!! =( then i started drooling...lol i kno sick but i did and it began to fall on her hair...lol at this point she was unaware and i began to laugh. i laufed so profusly that my PEE CAME GUSHING OUT! it was totally out of my control!...lol sheesh there is something about peeing ur pants that takes me back to my childhood and the 5th grade...lol jk

*Your not cool unless you Pee your pants!...lol -Billy Madison

Advice for the day: dont wait till its too late, go to the bathroom @ the first sensation!...lol

-scenekidcali23